Who Left the Open Bag of Idiots?

Open Bag of Idiots

Go anywhere today and you’ll find what can only be described as an open bag of idiots every square mile. However, wouldn’t it be great if we could just keep them in their bags? Or in their houses? Even behind bars or cinder block walls? Yet there they are, roaming at will, on the freeways, at the grocery checkout. You see, the thing with idiots is that they unaware that they are idiots. So, we propose something like the city dog catcher, the Idiot Patrol. Any citizen can be an officer, permitted to carry a can of mace, lots of bags and a dictionary, roving the countryside in search of idiots to subdue and put back in their community bags.

Exciting Kitchen Items

You see, It’s like a Pandora’s box, but instead of releasing all the evils of the world, it just lets out a bunch of folks who think the Earth might be shaped like a taco and that unicorns are just horses who’ve had successful horn transplants. You might occasionally want to close the bag and hope they stay inside, but, unfortunately, they’re like glitter – once they’re out, they’re everywhere. You could find them in line at the supermarket trying to barter three buttons and a shoelace for a cart full of groceries, or at the park, insisting that ducks are just undercover government spies. All in all, while they might make you facepalm so hard you leave a mark, the world would certainly be a duller place without them! However, I think they should be kept kin their bags.

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