The majestic “before and after” photo that will wipe that smile off your face – a tale as old as time, or at least as old as smartphones with front-facing cameras. On the left, we see a young woman, full of hope, sass, and a metabolism that still works overtime. She’s striking the classic “bathroom selfie” pose, smirking like she just figured out how to avoid carbs without giving up wine.
And then… nine months later.
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Enter stage right: same mirror, same pose, but oh, how the tides have turned. That smile? Vanished. That carefree vibe? Replaced by a silent plea for back support and a lifetime supply of Tums. The caption reads, “Nine Months: It will wipe the smile right off your face,” which, let’s be honest, is the most honest piece of internet wisdom since someone typed, “Don’t read the comments.”
This image is pregnancy in a nutshell. One minute you’re giggling over baby name apps and wearing jeans with buttons. The next, you’re Googling “how to pee without waking up the entire neighborhood,” and eating pickles dipped in peanut butter like it’s haute cuisine.
Her expression says it all. She’s not mad. She’s just… tired. Tired in a way only someone who has to roll out of bed like a beached whale can understand. Somewhere between the stretch marks and mood swings, she realized that glow people talk about? It’s just sweat from trying to put on socks.
Still, there’s beauty in this chaos — a reminder that behind every glowing bump is a warrior in yoga pants who just wants a nap and maybe a cookie. Or seven.
So here’s to nine months of joy, discomfort, and discovering that maternity pants are, in fact, the world’s most underappreciated invention.
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