Rudolph’s Revenge

Rudolph’s Revenge

He finally snapped and they all felt the heat of Rudolphs revenge. He took out the others one at a time. Can you blame him?

Rudolphs Revenge
Rudolphs Revenge

There is only so long anyone, even a reindeer, can tolerate being laughed at and called names. I only wonder if he took them out in their sleep, because he seems like a sneaky bastard, or if he has a human hunter costume he wears when prowling for his prey. I suppose the answer is below.
“After everything was done, with all those in attendance, Rudolph got his gun, and had himself some vengeance.”

Happy Everything Now Leave Me Alone

Happy Everything

Happy everything! Wouldn’t it be nice to just get them all out of the way at once? Yet, it is nice that holidays are sprinkled though out the year, giving us time to spend with loved ones.

Happy Everything Now Leave Me Alone
Happy Everything Now Leave Me Alone

Christmas, Hanukkah, 4th of July, Valentines day, Presidents Day, so many holidays and faux holidays created by merchants to provide an excuse to spend money, that which we have, and don’t have. Too bad they can’t all be gotten out of the way in one felled swoop, however that means no time off work or school too.

Who Lit the fuse

Who lit the fuse?

Ok, who lit the fuse on your tampon? Men, I highly suggest you never use this phrase, especially if the woman in question knows where you sleep.

Who Lit the fuse
Who Lit the fuse

Yes, it’s a crude burn, but you know, sometimes you just have to trot this out when dealing with an irrationally angry female. To be fair we are still looking for a male equivalent, for those of you who will be hell bent for leather angry. If you have one, send it it and we’ll feature it!

One Hung Bunny

Unusual Beanie Baby Bunny?

One Hung Bunny is surely inappropriate for most of the ages that are into beanie babies, I’m thinking this is a customized job, as I have never seen this in the market place. Then again I don’t pay much attention to beanie babies anyway, so I can’t be sure. If it is customized they did a great job of matching finishes.

One Hung Bunny
One Hung Bunny

So is this an adult store beanie baby? That would be my best guess, as it isn’t your average, ordinary run of the mill beanie baby bunny. Shoot, this little guy couldn’t have enough blood in his body to stay alive when raising the staff. If he were real, that is.

I Have Reservations

I’ll Pass on Dinner Thank You

I have Reservations. Not to eat here, but about eating at a placed named this. Fatal Restaurant? Yikes! How about Soylent Green? Or maybe Eat Me. Bite Me. You’re For Dinner? Sit Down, Shut Up And Eat?

I Have Reservations
I Have Reservations

If dinner was free, and the meal could, but not necessarily would, prove fatal, would you eat it? I wouldn’t, I’d zip down the road to Del Taco and eat til full for relatively little money and the odds of me dying from the meal would be almost nil. This restaurant has the word Fatal right in the name, but I’m sure that’s a word that has a slightly different meaning where ever this is in the world than it would in somewhere like L.A.

Family Owned

Family Owned Business Sign

Have you ever worked for a family owned business where the family members also worked? I have, and the butting of heads is really something to behold. So much so, and usually over petty stuff, that it can make everyone uncomfortable.

Family Owned
Family Owned

It can be so childish, this situation, and watching siblings in a family owned business, adults mind you, argue like they are 6 years old is never good. Apparently that childhood rivalry takes a long time to evaporate in many cases. Then again there are situations where that is not the case, where everybody is pulling together lest they pull apart. Generally speaking they do better work, and are often more successful.

Think of the puppies

Don’t Shoplift!

Think of the puppies. If you don’t, you’ll regret it, this is cruel and unusual, a painful death, to be sure. The commercials are bad enough one at a time! And besides, getting shot and locked away for a long time would be bad too, but you may prefer that!

Think Of The Puppies
Think Of The Puppies

You know, her commercials for the ASPCA are a huge asset in saving innocent animals, but the thing is, they are just way too long. Whenever people see one come up on their TV screen everyone lets out a long, low, collective groan, even if said groan is only in their head, it is still there.

Always Confirm

Baptist Sign Say Confirm or Ignore

Confirm, always confirm. The baptists many times have the best signs. Then you walk in and boom, fire and brimstone. If that’s your thing, great, but me, I’ll still like the signs.

Always Confirm
Always Confirm

These signs make me wonder how effective they are in getting people in the door. Not funny signs in general, they are effective, but funny signs on Baptist churches. Baptists are know for their fire and brimstone, everyone is going to hell approach, so repent not and be saved, it is fiery, and all well and fine for them. But when I see their signs, though I may laugh because they are funny, I also think in the back of my head, “Nice try. I know you guys, it’s not all laughs and giggles once you’re in there.”

Was she born with it

Not a Natural Look

Was she born with it? Nope, don’t think so. I think this may be a chemical thing.

Was She Born With It
Was She Born With It

 

So if there was ever a photo that you could whip out and show to kids the dangers of substance abuse, this would be the one. Now maybe this is the ladies natural, normal look, but the odds are largely against that, in my opinion. Wait, I’m assuming this is a lady, but it could in fact be a man, which makes this a much more extreme case to be made against substance abuse.

Funny Signs Seems Legit

Pizza Sign – Seems Legit

From the department of Funny Signs seems legit. Sure dinosaurs are now extinct because they never had Woody’s pizza. I mean, why not? I know I’d be extinct without pizza. Oh sure, you could argue that science shows they died millions of years ago, but had there been pizza you can’t say for sure that dinosaurs wouldn’t still be around. You don’t KNOW that.

Funny Signs Seems Legit
Funny Signs Seems Legit

So if science ever manages to clone dinosaur DNA and bring those giant lizards back to life, they had better make sure to have lots of pizza at the ready!