Drink More Beer

“The doctor said I ought to drink more beer.”
“No he didn’t!”
“Bartender, doctor, same same.”

What a wonderful world it would be if beer did cure cancer. A great many PBR drinkers in Banjoland would live, well, forever! Super Bowl Sunday would be a therapeutic day of health, bars would be clinics, and Moe on The Simpsons would wear a smock and one of these shiny reflector doohickeys on hos forehead. But alas, it doesn’t, and it’s marginal at curing thirst as well, alcohol being a diuretic. Still, it has it’s uses. In ages old they called it Liquid Bread, and Bed Franklin is said to have penned “Beer is proof there is a God, and he wants us to be happy.”